The stoics saw life as a mission, where the objective was to cultivate honour and excellence of character. They understood this truth and offered us a roadmap to navigate the twists and turns of our journey.
Let's explore the four Stoic virtues that can transform your life and bring out the hero within you:
Wisdom: The ideal that develops understanding and insight. It's about seeking knowledge, questioning assumptions, and applying practical wisdom to every aspect of your life. Wisdom helps you make sound decisions, see through misconceptions, and navigate the difficulties of the world without getting f*cked.
Justice: The virtue that guides your interactions with others. It's about treating people with fairness, humanity, and respect. Just treat people how you want to be treated. Be a force for good in the world. Stand up for what's right and work towards creating a moral society. Simple.
Temperance: The virtue of self-control and moderation. It's about managing your desires, fears, and impulses. By delaying gratification, you become the master of your own choices, avoiding excess and finding balance. It empowers you to resist temptation, make healthy decisions, and live in alignment with your values.
Courage: The virtue that fuels your inner strength and resilience. It's about facing challenges head-on, especially in the face of fear and uncertainty. Courage allows you to step outside your comfort zone, pursue the things you want in life, and stand up for what you believe in. Embrace discomfort, for it is the place where true courage is born.
These virtues are not rigid boxes to fit into but a starting point to base your values and morals on. They intertwine and weave into every aspect of your life, guiding your thoughts, actions, and relationships in positive directions. Embrace them as tools for developing your moral code. Every man needs code, you’re no different. Stand for something or fall for anything.
THE DICHOTOMY OF CONTROL
Picture a time when you worried about things beyond your control, like the weather ruining your plans or the patriarchy ruining your finances. It's a common human experience. But what if I told you there's a way to break free from the headlock of your worries?
The Stoics understood that some things are up to us, while others are not. They taught us to focus our energy on what is within our control and let go of the rest. This is the essence of the Dichotomy of Control.
Imagine a rainy day. Instead of fretting about the weather, a Stoic would prepare by bringing an umbrella or wearing a rain jacket. They accept that they may get wet but know they have the power to dry off later. They distinguish between what they can influence and what they cannot, choosing to invest their energy wisely.
You can do this with all of your worries. Being bothered by things is a choice. You gain nothing by being bothered by life's events. It doesn't change the world; you just suffer. There's always going to be something that can bother you, if you let it.
By embracing the Dichotomy of Control, you free yourself from unnecessary anxieties and frustrations. You reclaim your power and direct it towards what truly matters—your thoughts, actions, and responses. It's a game-changer that brings you peace of mind in the face of life's challenges.
Stoicism is not about escaping reality or denying emotions. It's about embracing the wisdom of the past to make your life better. By incorporating Stoic virtues into my life, I found I had way more energy to focus on the things that mattered. Like my goals, my purpose, my mission and becoming a better man.
You’ll be amazed by how much time you spend worrying about things you have no control over.
Other people's opinions: We have no control over how others perceive or judge us. You could compliment someone with the best intentions and they could still take it the wrong way. A Stoic would focus on living according to their own values and principles, rather than worrying about seeking validation from others.
Past events: Until time travel becomes a thing, we can’t change the past. What’s done is done. A Stoic would accept that what has happened cannot be changed and instead focus their energy on the present moment and the actions they can take moving forward.
External circumstances: We can’t control everything that happens in the world. We can’t control the economy. We can’t control natural disasters occurring. We definitely can’t control future events. A Stoic would focus on developing inner resilience and accepting the unpredictability of life, understanding that worrying about external events does not prevent or change them. Trying to control the uncontrollable is just a waste of energy. Become so resilient that you can handle whatever life throws at you.
Other people's actions: We can’t control or change how others choose to behave. A Stoic would focus on their own character and response, striving to act honourably regardless of others' actions. All we can do is show up to every interaction with people as the best version of ourselves. Treat others how you want to be treated, it’s that simple.
Aging and mortality: Aging is a natural part of life that none of us can escape. A Stoic would embrace the present moment, live with gratitude, and focus on the quality of their actions and relationships rather than dwelling on the inevitable passage of time.
These virtues will take time to sink in but gradually you’ll notice yourself being less bothered by all the stuff the average person is preoccupied by. You’ll stop caring what others think, worrying about the latest crisis on the news, being triggered by something someone you don’t know did. Until one day you’ll find yourself in the rarefied atmosphere, where you don’t even care about the weather anymore.
Always remember, you were born to be the hero of your story.
Free your outlaw.