When You Don't Know What a Man is Supposed to Be, You Try to Become Everything
The state of play:
- From childhood, most people are trained to seek security not freedom.
- Raised to externalise their power instead of develop internal authority.
- The system (school, culture, media, even family) rewards obedience, approval-seeking, and safety.
- Over time, you’re subtly conditioned to avoid risk, avoid standing out, and avoid responsibility.
- Instead of being led by inner conviction, most people build a “false self” one designed to gain validation and blend in.
As a result, mature masculinity is a myth in the modern world.
Without a real model of manhood, most men become actors when they could be architects.
They perform for the crowd when they could be living by their own design.
We put on the mask that wins us approval:
The Nice Guy. The Professional. The Smart One. The Cool One.
But underneath it all is a boy chasing what he thinks will fill the void:
Success. Status. Validation. Freedom.
But no matter how far he runs, no matter how much he builds, that quiet dissatisfaction never leaves.
Because deep down, what he’s really chasing…is the ability to look in the mirror and finally feel proud of the man staring back.
